Episode 41 : Permission Granted

This week's episode went somewhere really special. Jen and Rachel sit down with Jennifer Short — hairdresser, breathwork facilitator, Human Design devotee, and one of the most quietly extraordinary humans in Wichita — inside her salon, Colour Thairapy, for a conversation about transformation, permission, and what it actually means to build a life that feels like yours.

From Hutchinson to Wichita. From the salon chair to the breath mat. From performing loyalty for everyone else to finally giving it to herself. Jennifer's story is the kind that sneaks up on you and then hits somewhere deep.
Grab your wine. This one's worth savoring.

In This Episode

This or That: Wellness Edition - Jennifer joins Jen and Rachel for a wellness-and-mindset-themed round of This or That — and the conversation goes places none of them planned. Highlights include:

Jennifer's complicated (and hilarious) history with journaling — including why written evidence once felt dangerous

Jen's journals thrown in the dumpster by an ex — and Tim's Valentine's Day gift that brought it full circle

Why "outgrow the room or build a bigger one" turned into a full philosophy of life

The moment everyone realized they'd basically agreed on everything — and somehow still had plenty to say

From Hutchinson to Wichita: A New Identity - Jennifer started doing hair in 1997 in Hutchinson — and for years, she was "just a hairdresser," even when she owned the business. Moving to Wichita in 2018 changed everything. She talks about:

Why Hutchinson spoke small to her — and how she believed it

What it felt like when Wichita saw her differently

How COVID gave her clarity instead of taking something from her

The Hive, Human Design & Finding Belonging  - Joining The Hive Wichita in 2019 cracked something open. Jennifer shares:

What it felt like to finally be in a room where people truly saw her

Reframing her ADHD brain from a flaw to manage to a superpower to lead with

Being a 2/5 Manifesting Generator — and what it means when people project answers onto you before you've spoken

Breathwork, Sovereign Inhale & the Cellular Shift - Jennifer describes her breathwork journey as "quiet and cellular and permanent" — and unpacks what that actually means:

The difference between masculine and feminine breathwork approaches

How the breath gets us out of our minds and into our bodies

How Sovereign Inhale was born — and what it looks like to offer it to others virtually and in groups

The Soft Life & The Permission Question The question "Who were you waiting for permission from?" stopped the room. Jennifer's answer:

Why building a soft life is the bravest thing she's ever done — and why "soft" doesn't mean easy

The Chair and the Breath Mat Are the Same Work - People ask how a salon and a breathwork practice belong together. Jennifer's answer is always the same: they were never separate. Both are about sitting with a woman in the middle of her becoming and saying — I see you. You are safe here. Let's figure out who you're stepping into next. She's been doing that work since 1997. She just finally has the language for all of it.

🔗 Find Jennifer Short
Colour Thairapy — salon, right off Douglas across from Naftzger Park, Wichita
Sovereign Inhale — breathwork + coaching, virtual and in-person
Instagram: @sovereigninhale
Website: sovereigninhale.com

🛍️ Merch Shop Uncorked and Slightly Unhinged and Messy is My Polished  
📲 Follow & Subscribe Find us on Spotify and YouTube — and if this episode moved you, a review means the world. 🍷

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Cheers. Here we are.

SPEAKER_00 0:02

So this happened.

SPEAKER_01 0:06

I'm Jen.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

I'm Rachel.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

And we are here today with Jennifer Short of Color Therapy. Have a fun intro. Yes, my friend Chat wrote this, but it's so good that we have to actually say it out loud. Okay. Tonight we have a guest who has been transforming women from the outside in for nearly 30 years. And then somewhere along the way, she gave herself permission to be transformed to. She's a hairstylist, a breathwork practitioner, an entrepreneur, a human design devotee, and honestly, one of the most interesting people in Wichita. Jennifer Short of Color Therapy is here, and we have a lot to get into. But first, we're gonna play this or that. Oh, right. I am excited. Now here's okay, here's something fun. So you have not seen them. No, no, didn't pay attention. Like you're like wrong, but I was like, I really wanted to like have it be like Yeah. I really do respond with my say girls. Yeah, it's gonna be a gut, like the same. To keep things fair, I also haven't looked at them. Or like ever. Oh look at it. I didn't look at them. Nope. So those are two good ones. That I'm gonna get these are generated by Chad GBT. Yeah, yeah. Generated. Generated demonstrate. Okay. Um my prompts become their prompts. Okay, okay. I love this person though. Okay. Journaling or talking it up. We'll start with Jennifer. Okay, I kind of was hoping that you were gonna say that because I do without getting too long-winded and have a little story behind that. I did not journal for the longest time because I did not actually want written evidence of how actual fucked up. Oh, can I cuss? Absolutely. Yeah, this was narcissistic simplistic. I did not want evidence that can get used against me that my brain worked in that way. And so, and I had a friend in middle school that her mom wrote these really explicit journals, and my friend and I read them, and then she told her dad because her mom was having an affair with the pastor. Oh my gosh, she read Goth. Oh, it was that it was like there should have been Fabio in front of the show. No, she was but it like I watched my friend's whole family fall apart, and it was all because her mom left evidence of what her thoughts and what was happening. Oh my goodness, in middle school, yeah, so it was just like I feel like there was a mental note, and my I feel like in my life, when my design is, I go through life because I like shortcuts. So I go through life, and when I see something really tragic, it's like okay, mental note, never do that. Yeah, mental note. Yeah, and so it was like, okay, don't journal because if you journal, nobody can use it against you. That's true. But you also don't have evidence of how far you grow the documentation. And so I honestly started using Facebook about two years ago to really start like capturing at least an essence of my journey, yeah. So that I have evidence of like pictures, like a scrap, like a digital scrapbook. Yeah, yes, like so. I do think it's important to grow. Like so I'm playing with it. I'm getting curious. Do it. My journaling looks like shorthand. Nobody could ever actually read it. I don't know what it's a great. Oh yeah, okay, like the courthouse shorthand that nobody could read it. So what were the questions?

SPEAKER_00 3:57

It was journaling or or talking it out. Okay, well, what do you think you do most of is my talk it out?

SPEAKER_01 4:03

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:04

Like I'm talking out with my clients, my clients talk it out. Oh, that's so true. I know we've talked a lot of things at this time. I'm similar in the respect that like same to for like the same reasons to a degree of like it, especially if it's something that is really painful, whether it's your fault or not, or something else that's hurting you, or just things that are worrying you or making you acious, writing them down seems to make them more real. And I'm not one of those, like, like I'm not Carrie Bradshaw. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna, you know, I'm not gonna be like, today big dumped me again, or love like I'm not gonna I'm not gonna write about that stuff, but like I do always have a journal, but I barely, very rarely write it, but I do love it because I to this day look back on my journaling from five years ago. And I honestly, a lot of times, like again, the growth. I used to write about the very terrible things I'd gone through. And I see the date and back five years ago, I look at the date that I did write it, and I was like, wow, that wasn't that long ago. And look how far I've come. And that made me feel very good, but also kind of still made come out. But like, so it's it's both. It goes both ways. So I really have an appreciation for drawing, but my personality is I don't know if it's a time restraint thing, but also my brain has so many different like I'm a spider web of thoughts about my feelings. Yeah, so I don't I don't have the time to write all five of them down, so like all five directions of my thoughts about what I'm going through. So I talk it out. Jin knows her ears are so weird. We were on the phone for five minutes, and I think I went through 20 thoughts. From like a week and a half, and then I went, oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't even let you finish your sentence. What? Like after I went to the case.

SPEAKER_01 5:52

Well, actually, like that's kind of why I told you because I knew that we were gonna need to do that before we have the issue.

SPEAKER_00 5:58

Okay, she's like, I need to empty Rachel's brain, so I'm gonna do this. That is like a no, she's amazing. She knows, but so yeah, I would say I talk it out more often, but I have mad respect for journaling, and I really see it's like what's so good about it.

SPEAKER_01 6:16

I've had an interesting journey with journaling. I started journal journaling in second grade because my this has a lot of facets. My mom thought it would be a good idea for me to journal. I think she and my ma'am journaled when she was little, she thought it was a good idea, and so she gave me my first journal, and I was in second grade. If you could read it, she did. Oh, sorry, yeah. No, that's exactly it, though. She did. Yeah, I know, and my freaking diary. Not just once, and like, so I would like not write in it for a long time, then I start writing in a diary again, yeah, and then find out she read it. So then I would start hiding it, and then like she would find the hiding stuff, but like I still kept doing it, and I kept all my journals. However, in my past marriage, my ex-husband threw them all in the duster. Yeah, shit. And that's so fucked in F deck. That's so up.

SPEAKER_00 7:09

That's your pen to paper that you'll never.

SPEAKER_01 7:11

That's my documentation of life, like so my whole life. There was one that was left, and it was the one where I it was the last part of my pregnancy with Macy. Oh, so I do have that one still. I do still have that one. Yes, I have the last part of my pregnancy with Macy. And yeah, and I never finished that journal. Like, I just stop. But Tim, because I do internally, you both probably know that I am so bad about internalizing literally everything. It takes like, it takes like a major tug of war to get stuff out of me sometimes. And but Tim for Valentine's Day, because I'm going through a new health journey myself right now, he got me a journal for Valentine's Day. And he even wrote out on the first page about how he's gonna be there, step of the way to support me. And he hopes that I use this journal for you know documenting and sharing my feelings and encouragement or discouragement, those kinds of things throughout. And so that just really for me, full circle, like from my ex-hasman, throwing them all in the dumpster to that means a lot. And I don't even think Tim thought about that when he got me this journal. I think he's just that thoughtful that he's like, this would be nice for her because I know that she likes to do this stuff. Yes, and it's yeah, honestly, like one of the sweetest gifts I think I've ever gotten. And it was just so meaningful to me and very full circle.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

So you are very good. I'm right. I think yeah, you definitely don't talk it out unless I asked the right questions at the right time. Yeah, yeah. And I can sense it, and like and you can tell because I go, hmm, and the next time I go, hmm, a little bit a little bit more with my tongue.

SPEAKER_01 8:54

I feel like, and then you get this little nudge that's so good.

SPEAKER_00 8:57

And then and then you and then I hear that breath and I go, it's something what is it? What is that? Yes, but no, I totally get that in a lot of regards because I still think even when I write in my journal, I still do write in the sense on a positive way and like kind of in a way, towards like if as dark as this might be, if I die and someone finds my journals. Right. And that's what I've always thought. I'd be like, how cool would that be? But you're a legend, one song. But it depends on what mood I'm in when I do write in them. Some of them I go like sometimes I write to my past self, sometimes I write to my future self, sometimes I write to a part of me, sometimes I write to a friend. I I've even read like letters to my family members and stuff in there, and like thoughts and feelings and stuff like that. And so, and not just the like, hey, this is for when they die, but like if they ever were to, it's more for my processing. Yeah, but um, yeah, I thought so that was a great question. We could go into that one.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

I know that one we went some places there. Okay, so the next one. Are we morning ritual people or are we night windown people? Okay, because my and I'll just get this out because of my neurospicy, which is for me ADHD, but I call it neurospicy. I love that. I need I'm forever gonna do that. Like, so I naturally resist like routines and habit stacking, but I do best with that. Right. That's what I respond best with. And I hate accountability, but I need accountability in order to be successful. So uh in my morning, like I definitely am a coffee person and I have a certain playlist that I listen to every single day. Oh, that's really cool. Um it's 2026, so it shall be. And it's all my like mantra and like get it girl kind of. But it's kind of like living in a Disney movie all the time. Yeah, but then at night, like I do a like when I get in bed, I definitely call back all my energies because like when you go and leave your essence out with people, even in thoughts and conversation, and then you try to be present in something. If you don't call back your energies, like you're not gonna get the best sleep, not only the best present. So I kind of try to call my energies back in and then find some things that I'm grateful for, and like really fill into it to that moment. Like, I'm so thankful, grateful for that moment, you know. And then I try to say at least 10 times, like, the universe is here to support me. Like by saying that, like, it's until you believe it, and I've done it for like two years now. Straight like those moments when you don't feel like the universe is here to support you that like having had that programmed in your head, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:07

So so you it sounds to me like you enjoy your window in the evenings more, yeah. Because the morning feels more pressure, yeah, yeah. Yes, I love that. I totally understand that. I I am more of an evening person, wind down because same as you actually described it really, really well. I find that pressure of Ning Show up so anxiety feeling, but I also love it and I'm excited for it, especially if it's something that like is like, hey, this is a goal I want, and this is what I have to do to reach that goal. And like I'm ex I'm like anxiously excited, but also like nervous to do it. I don't know how you describe it perfectly to where like having those commitments is so like uh but I do so much better with routines, right? I feel better with routines, but for some reason I resist them so much, even when I'm like tired, my body busies itself to make myself feel more comfortable, even in the evenings when like okay, I could just go to sleep. I'm like, oh, I could go do this thing in my house, I could go do this thing in my house, oh I could make a list, oh I could sit here and watch. Oh no, I like this show. Nah, that's one, you know, like it's all over the place. And I get what you're saying about calling back your energies too, because especially if you're in different environments or around a lot of new people or different situations or not even new people, but just new feelings, even. I rerun things in my head all the time in the evenings. Yeah, and I think that makes me almost like maybe I'm less of an evening person. That's just when all of everything hits me. So it takes a while for me to debrief in the evenings to disperse all of that and put it in the right place so I can actually go to bed. Yeah. If that makes sense. So I'm more of an evening person, but I I I used to like wake up at 6 a.m. and go running and then shower and then go to work. Where's that girl? Like, no, I yeah, so it's a mixture because I do love quiet mornings when I can have a slow morning, but you know, when I need to get ready and go to work and all that, it is like I'm more of an aimy person because that feels more like me time. Yeah, and it is, it feels more focused internally than in the morning. I'm not thinking about me, I'm thinking about what I have to go do. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:43

I think so, I love I think I'm a little bit of both. I'm I'm I will never claim to be a morning person ever. But on the weekend mornings when we don't have big things to get out and do, or in hotel rooms, I love the morning. Yeah, because I like to get up and I like to put on my eye patches and I like to make my coffee and do my skincare and watch a cute show for a little while, maybe get on my laptop and just just ease and ease the day and see hell yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:16

When I retire, if I ever can, I'll be a morning person.

SPEAKER_01 15:21

So yeah, those are things that I enjoy about. Like if I were a morning person every day, yes, I could maybe do that. That would be nice. But the honest truth is I am a windown person. I like to just I don't know, decompress from the day, but escape into something else.

SPEAKER_00 15:42

Like I've even been escape is part of it as well.

SPEAKER_01 15:45

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lately it's been down to Naby or Lucifer. Tim and I are re-watching Lucifer and it's hilarious, or even Gal time like this, or even Gal time like this, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:55

Just talking about escape, like yes, I know it's still like in Cav, it's more of a relaxing escape, you know.

SPEAKER_01 16:02

Yeah, it's a fun thing to get to do for sure. I mean we're just out here on little girls' night with a microphone, so nothing nothing wrong with that. Okay, so we'll we'll do one more. Okay, I love this one. Outgrow the room or build a bigger one. That's a tough one. I know. I would say build a bigger one. Like, don't yeah, don't stay stuck. Like, that's that's the probably the biggest thing. Like, if you look at my story, like as the hero's journey, if you will, like everybody's story is a hero's journey. That's the story of life, right? But like it's definitely like I stayed stuck in one place for a long time. Yeah. That had very spoke small to me. Yeah. And every room I went into, and and that made me believe it. And then I went to a different town, and everybody allows different, you know, there's so many different voices, yeah. And there's so many that are willing to say this room's not big enough for me. Yeah, you know, and then like, yeah, it's that option too, you know. But I also, in all honesty, like, real quick, like I my like what I'm looking for in the room is my joy and not the size of it. Does that make sense? Yes, you can think that's an important success for me now. Is does it feel juicy and does it give me the freedom of my morning? Yeah, give me my joy back, yeah. And maybe I I don't make as much money, but that freedom of time is so much more fores it make you wholesale like so, but I'm not judging my room or what I'm in by somebody else's standards, yeah. It's only my standards, yeah, and my standards are big for what my joy is, yeah, but it's not necessarily necessarily like consumer, yeah, right? So it's not necessarily my father person, yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 18:06

A brick and mortar building or connection, relationship. Just like being present and growing your own self and that regret. Yeah, yeah, I'd say similar. There's a quote, I can't, I don't remember who it said it, but it's like some people are waiting for the next door to open. If you don't have a door, build a door. Oh yeah. Build a door, make your own door, go somewhere new, open a new opportunity for yourself. And I mean, it doesn't always work that easily. Sometimes building a door is tough. But so I would say make the room bigger as well because also if you make the room bigger, yeah, I feel like as long as you keep the good energy about, like we have, like you will just attract and like you'll just attract the right people and the right opportunities kind of will just off align and fall aplace. Yeah, our timing has just been impeccable with like the guests aligning we had me and plan, we didn't even like plan lining up our guests with like the stuff that was going on, like throughout the last year we've been doing this to start it, and it just all has like patterned out well. Serendipity, whatever you want to call it. I think just make the room bigger, you know. Um I love that, yes. I and so I'd say make it bigger. I of course want but I never fill the space sounds kind of like ho ho, look at me, you know. Yes, and I never want to be like that. Of course, fill it with good energy while you're there, but build a door with it. I love that animation.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

I yeah, you know, I think um I think in my younger, the younger parts of my career, I was very much I'm gonna outgrow this place, I'm gonna outgrow this place kind of person. And but that was until I really started appreciating community and the community that I was building along the way. And there, I've had a lot of different communities and I've had a lot of different friendships. And I've also had friendships that I've shed throughout this time. And early in my career, I thought it was because I had outgrown a room. But honestly, it was just me moving through different chapters of my life and seeing that I could. What am I, what was the thing?

SPEAKER_00 20:32

Well, also there's condos, you know.

SPEAKER_01 20:34

Build a very one. I I've built my like my community kept growing. And I noticed, you know, I'm only letting go of a few people. And the reason I'm letting go of these people is because they're toxic or they just right. They don't necessarily fit into my life the way that they used to.

SPEAKER_00 20:47

And that does not mean they won't come back around when the sun is. They do, I think.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

Yeah, and that that's kind of what I was I'm gonna It's recently happened. It it has recently happened, and it's it's happened in a really interesting way that I never really thought it would. It was definitely been with the live streaming situation when you don't even know this. So I saw your live stream post, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:12

Oh, so yeah, but I didn't read all of it because I'm so excited.

SPEAKER_01 21:16

For not everyone, I don't know how many people that watch this podcast know that I uh have another podcast that I've had for nine years called Making It Marketer. We love Megan. We love Megan, my co-host Megan, she's out in San Diego. That podcast, we recently had a really awesome live streamer, streamer live streamer on, and we've wanted her on for years. Her name is Luria Petrucci, and she is like her company is called Live Streaming Pros. And someone I've looked up to in the industry for literally a decade. And so on that episode, we went live and it was amazing, but it was also a disaster because Megan's internet, for whatever reason that day kept going in and out. And I've in the early part of season nine, which is the season that we're in on Mingia Market right now, I had kind of pulled away a little bit because I felt like I wasn't attached to that community as much anymore. And I felt shy to be out, you know, outreach, like to reach out to people, like who am I to reach out to these people? They probably don't even remember why like just real I was really in my head. I was so far in my head. And finally I told Megan about this. So she's like, Jet, it's pretty little. No, no, no, no, no. That's not the case. I love Megan.

SPEAKER_00 22:33

Just like Vinces Happening. I can't remember for when I'm freaking out.

SPEAKER_01 22:38

Well, just somebody in your pocket that can talk you off the edge of the clip. So we went live. It was a disaster, but it was also really fun. The episode was insane. So good. So many navigates. It was so weird though, because that the day that that episode dropped, published, was also the day this the episode that we went live. So last Thursday, we did it was crazy. We went live. And it was also, it wasn't perfect. No, it was definitely first-time feelings, but it was some bit like I am.

SPEAKER_00 23:11

We did it lying next to each other because in my dining room. In case I have to be traveling for work, we wanted to make sure that it could work.

SPEAKER_01 23:17

Right. Yeah. So we're just pressing buttons.

SPEAKER_00 23:19

Yeah. And then I was like, hi guys, my laptop died.

SPEAKER_01 23:23

So I work on the middle of the episode.

SPEAKER_00 23:26

Oh my god. And it's funny, I watched that part and it was like it went dark on half. And then it was like, I died. I died. Like that was a thing. Yeah, I left that part in because I thought it was cool. And then I was like, just let me on yours, Jen. I don't have a room, buddies. And then I was like, hi back.

SPEAKER_01 23:42

So I just I thought that that was really cool that those episodes dropped on the same day. That's funny. And what I had learned from this entire thing, one, I'm I is re-reinvigorated in my passion. I want to go live for a reason. I'm figuring that out right now. I'm gonna figure out what that's gonna be. But it it has re-engaged me into the into this community of amazing social media marketers, live streamers, people that I used to be connected to. And now I I feel worthy of that and for some reason.

SPEAKER_00 24:11

I see that and feel that in AJ too. Like you have this extra glove confidence around you. Like you always have, but it's it's getting such like a different layer of it is shinier. And I could tell. That's exciting. I'm excited for you. I'm excited to see. You were just always doing amazing shit. I love it. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 24:30

Well, what I love about this is they say certain, you know, you should you are who you surround yourself with. And we are a room of people that want to like just outgrow and and keep building another room. Shoot, I'll take friends. Let everyone love us and love everyone while we're at it and just keep making you friends.

SPEAKER_00 24:48

We've all agreed on like basically every one of those questions, but these have brought us into amazing talking points.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

I know, and it's built a really great foundation for what I think the rest of the the conversation's gonna be. So yeah. Now it's time to dive into who Jennifer is.

SPEAKER_02 25:03

Oh, okay, yes.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

Yes, okay, so which one? I'm surrounded. This one right now. Okay, so Wichita didn't just give you a new market. You're coming from Hutchinson. Yes. And Wichita didn't just give you a new market, gave you a new identity, which we kind of alluded to in this or that. This magic of this or that. So what did that actually feel like in real time? And was there a moment where you noticed something had shifted? Yeah. So I was born and raised in Hutchison, and when I became a hairdresser in '97, I remember like that. Was just growing up. It was like you found a profession, you got in it, and you worked it until you died. And that was like right. And life was. But it it was also like a a dichotomy of I'm a hairdresser, so like it's not a college education. So then it wasn't like I never felt in Hutchison like I was a business owner, yeah. Even though I actually owned a business, yeah, I was just a hairdresser. Like it's only and then you come to Wichita, and Wichita is so infectious with like incubators and like business building and all these things, and it's such an environment, and you get and you get recognized, and they're like, What are you talking about? You have multiple businesses, and I'm like, oh, they're you know, hobbies yourself, it's just crazy.

SPEAKER_00 26:45

That's what I love about Witch Shaw. Like the last like few years, like honestly, even more than a few years, like I feel like it's just been like going like this with the way that it's like small business appreciation. I think it's been more as more than it's always I guess that's just what I've dove in was the last like four, three, four, like maybe even only three years or less that I've really dove in a bit to like get acquainted with a community that is doing that, and it's amazing. It's pretty honestly. Yeah, and it's really inspiring. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 27:19

Yeah, I think it's awesome. I do too. So so in Hutchison, you you described operating small, yeah. So so I just considered that I just I'm just a DBA, I'm just a hairstylist, yeah, like, you know, and so I just kept in a very I mean I did work for Joico, so I traveled in Taiwan for 10 years part-time, and so that was kind of like my skate to get out of Kansas and like go be in the world and we're away. The world just out oh, all over the United States. Yeah, yeah, for how long? So 10 years. That's amazing. And I love that in Joyco is still your product of choice too. I know. So yeah, it's a great product, yeah. They're wonderful.

SPEAKER_00 28:09

Cut me and I probably played Joyco. So, how long ago was it that you really felt like you got your footing here?

SPEAKER_01 28:19

Well, it was probably a little bit after COVID. Oh, that recent. Yeah, yeah. So I guess is that. Well, I mean, I opened, yeah, I opened the year, like the month that we got shut down for COVID. I was my eight-year anniversary of being open. Wow. Wow. And they were like, congratulations, shut down. What a nightmare.

SPEAKER_00 28:41

So hey, if I was in plan, if I was in front, I would still be coming to your house. I'd be like, hey girl, like I need to cut.

SPEAKER_01 28:47

Yeah, things are still having to happen.

SPEAKER_00 28:49

You cut me on the street, not on your salon. I don't care.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

Um so did you you launched color therapy, but you were still living in Hutchinson? No, I when I launched color therapy, I was living here. You're already here, okay. Yeah, I had gone through a divorce, and like after a couple years, I started dating in Wichita because you know, it's not fun to have your clients sloppy seconds. Yeah, and we just live in a small community. I mean, what else is there? Yeah, that's so true. Yeah, smaller all the time. So I dated over here, and it was like, so I ended up moving over here, and so I just still drove back to Hutch and did hair there.

SPEAKER_00 29:27

Yeah, but lived and I'm sure it was a transitional because you sold clients that you had. Yeah, because all my money. Yeah, that makes sense. But hey, where's it at now?

SPEAKER_01 29:38

I know. So let's speak a little bit about that. Like that, like how the whole COVID thing like it gave you some clarity on what you wanted to do. Yeah, I mean, I still went back one day a week and did a 12-hour day and would like make most of my money in one day. And that's the crazy thing was at the time I had more renters. Uh-huh. So, like, there were some Saturdays I couldn't even work because I had a house full of girls. Uh-huh. So, but I was driving back to Hutch still doing hair. And so, when COVID shut down, like it was a thing. They weren't supposed to come to Sedgwick County to get their hair done. Oh. But like, it was okay for me to drive from Sedgwick and do it in Reno. It was interesting. But like, when it finally everything shut down, then it was like when we open back up, as like, I think that this needs to be my focus and not keep because I'm really keeping one foot in this door and one foot in that door, and I'm not making a decision.

SPEAKER_00 30:36

Well, that's kind of like a blessing disguise, then in a way, because it lets you really have like a limbo time period to be like something to blame it on. That's it.

SPEAKER_01 30:47

Yeah, it like I have a very avoidant major, I avoid conflict, and I don't want to cool down. Yeah. And so it was a way for me to say this is not feasible.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

Hey, I would like to reframe that as making the worst out of the worst situation. There you go. I'd like to reframe that. I think you should you shouldn't say good morning things, you should say you made the best with what you were given. That's definitely not turned out. Yeah, sure. Let's do it. That's space. Because I completely get it. Yeah. But I try to be kind to myself too. I know. I'm doing the best with what I'm gonna do because that's what I'm good at is being positive.

SPEAKER_01 31:27

Yeah, it's so true. We can bar when we first opened. Uh-huh. Uh so we've done that. Yeah. So we had that before COVID. But then when COVID opened back up with the oxygen bar, like it's real oxygen, but it's pushing through. So, like, yeah, through the the scents. So, like, but if you have COVID, like you're more likely to put it out in the area.

SPEAKER_02 31:51

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

So then it was like, well, our hair shouldn't be exposed is because somebody's recreationally breathing oxygen. Yeah. Yeah. So I felt like a dirty to like, so then we then like that rolled into another company and that for a while. Yeah. But we finally sold all that. Okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah, congratulations. New chapter. New pivot. So you said for the first time you were in a room where people truly saw you. Speaking of in Wichita, what had what had rooms felt like before that for you? Well, I never knew honestly until like I went to the Hive, which is a networking, co-working space in the Orpheum uh downtown, that like there were so many other women out there like me, like with super ADHD, that like have a million one interests, that are artsy, that care about their families, that like are good people. Yeah. And then I got into the this room and there's all these other women, and they're all as overwhelming as I am. You are the most beautiful thing about it, honestly, is that like so being neurospicy, like it's very easy to get overstimulated, right? Or you are you're having this day and it required so it sucks so much out of you. Yeah, and you're supposed to do this networking thing and you promise you're gonna be there. Yeah, and people that are neurotypical or that are authentic, they expect you to perform, and these girls don't. These girls, I can text and say, you know what, my bandwidth is a hit, yeah, and I don't have to worry about being judged, and it's very beautiful, yeah. Like, yeah, and they can hold me accountable in a way that's gentle and log in and understand me, but also like be like, but she need to get your shit done. Yeah, because I don't want to see your business club.

SPEAKER_00 33:52

I mean, that's even you know, even like that's what Jen called me before. I it was a conference because she knew I needed the dumps, yeah, and then even when I should appear, and she was like, Yeah, she just traveled, and I was like, Yeah, so I'm fine with the time to like chill and chit-chat to like get me back into wearing this other hat, you know, like it's we just like get it. Like that's what I feel like that's what people that understand you know the way we feel.

SPEAKER_01 34:22

I think that's honestly I know we feel um like we're not graceful, but I almost feel like that makes us so much more graceful because like we're genuine, you know, and I think the biggest one of the biggest things I learned there, like so one of the things that everybody says that they learned the most from me is that when I moved here, like I chose some things to change about me when I moved here. Yeah. So like if you talk to somebody that knew me in Hutchison, one of the things they would tell you is I always run late. Like nobody in Wichita would ever in a million years tell you that I run late. Yeah, I am earlier on time. It's amazing. Like because I just changed that, yeah. Yeah, like I wear boho hats and big readers, like everybody knows that about me, and that's just part of my style. But I allowed myself the freedom to fill into what felt good, you know what I mean? And make those changes and be like real. So I would say it's exciting to move because you get to allow yourself a little bit more openness to not be like, this is what everybody, this is who I am according to everybody else I grew up with. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:33

Oh, it's about a we talk so much about finding our community, you're right. And that's like basically all about what we are, and so that's and that's why we're having it totally our our community.

SPEAKER_01 35:48

So, speaking of neurospicy, the shift from my brain is something to manage to my brain is my superpower, that doesn't just happen overnight. So, we'll crack that open for you. I think being in a room with other women permissioned me to like be authentic and and like they really didn't want the performance. Oh, they were trying to navigate being authentic themselves and what that looks like, and you know, like I mean, I just feel like especially women, like we've really just performed all the time, like yeah, because I feel like we've been that that's kind of how society has formed us. Yeah, yeah. It's like a you know, shut up and be quiet and sit still a pretty type of situation. Yeah, like that.

SPEAKER_00 36:37

If you cry or whine, you're weak, or if if uh something's a problem, like, oh, it's it's your fault because you're not trying hard enough, sort of thing. Like in general, about our society with everybody not regarding, you know. But really, it is just and it depends what area you grew up in, too. Oh, that's a big thing. You know, I I went to high school in a very kind of preppy area. But you know, so I never really identified with any of them, and I found outside friends who luckily have had great ones for a long, long time. Afterwards, even in college and whatnot, you know, you just and I feel like once you find that, it just grows. Yeah, something does just click again great bundle. I don't know, it's what I'm making sure it was just the bundle of great getting bigger. Like, I feel like that's what our communities do.

SPEAKER_01 37:29

I feel like the crazy thing about it though is that once you it really experience that, like unless you just end up in a situation where you get really desensitized to it, you just don't have the same tolerance, yeah, yeah, for the old. And I think that's what they start talking about awakening, like this pool. It's like once you know, you can't unknow. You can't do such a pool. Let's go through like I just had it come through to me like in Breathware is like when I abandon myself, like I don't love others better. Yeah, absolutely. I actually become the thing that hurt me, yeah, yeah, and like to other people, yeah, yeah, because I did, you know, I didn't give myself the space and stay with myself, I abandoned myself. That makes sense. Then I you know, but we'll tell ourselves like if I will abandon how I feel about this and just stay here, it'll be dominant. No, but then we become resentful, we become angry, absolutely, and then we're an asshole. And sleep that night and show up like when we're supposed to be.

SPEAKER_00 39:16

They just aren't there, you know, they're dealing with something. Because I've been there. Because you've been there, yeah. And so I get it. And you don't have to be a part of the healing. I'm not gonna understand it. But and I can still be nice to them because I've accepted mine, yeah. You know, even if they're nasty to us, or yeah, that's a beautiful thing, too. I love how you word your answer. Oh, I do too. Because it almost makes me feel like you're wording the way I feel about things. That's great. I'm like, yeah, what she said.

SPEAKER_01 39:48

No crumbs. So I've I've heard you talk a lot about breath work. So for those of you who don't know, Jennifer has been doing my hair for a while, and so we know each other well. I feel like you probably know me a little more. No, I know you pretty well too, because we're backing for 50-50. I feel like um, and what we've been talking more and more about the breath work as you've been kind of getting more and more into it. So uh you've talked about it as quite uncellular and permanent, and I love that. Can you help us understand what that actually like what how that translates to you know, other people that might not understand that and what changed, you know, world changed what words can't capture basically. Well, and I I was really glad that I did get that question ahead in time so I could really like feel into it. Like, okay, how do I really explain this? Because I did have an interaction with somebody the other day that had a different experience with breath work, and she had gone to an event, and it was there's a lot of different types of breath work. So breath is like a pattern of breathing, a way of breathing in a pattern over and over again for a certain amount of time, and then you add music to it, and it it will cause our bodies to go through a whole journey. Yeah, and so depending on the speed and the intensity will sometimes affect how it affects our body. So, and there's more masculine breath, which would be more like a holotropic breath, and that is a very like intense, like it's like a very like hyperventilative, it is not feminine, it is not gentle, it is not feel-good, it is exhausting. It can bring forth, like, and you can go on a journey, like I imagine it's like a workout. Oh, it's like emotional and oh, like everything, everything. It's all the things, but then you like what I've learned through the company I'm going through is that like intensity doesn't equal transformation, and so you can do more gentle ways that are uh more feminine and more like like calling in that like divine energy and doing it in a more cyclical manner. So like it's more quiet, but with having the neurospicy, like I would have like all these different narratives in my head going all the time, and I'm sure you that so like even though you're having a conversation, if there's any lull in it, any point that you feel slightly bored, like you start another conversation, or like if there's other things you haven't dealt with, you might have that come in too. And so it becomes if you're a parent, it's kind of like the like all those parts of you want to be seen and they want to be heard, and so they're trying to get your attention, yeah. And so the breath gets us out of our minds and out of the ego and out of the thoughts, yeah, and it gets us into our body, yes, so that we can be aware of do I have a pain in my back? Do my my shoulders feel heavy? Does it feel like I have a thousand pounds on my chest and I can't breathe? Do I have a pain in my foot? Like, where am I feeling it in my body? How does it feel in my body? And what is my body trying to tell me? Like, do I need to walk away from something? Do I need to let something go? Like, and it the experience is different for different people. Like, so some people say shapes, some people say colors, some people just like sleep. Like, I've I've literally seen somebody sleep, like it's not like the intensity like doesn't equal, like I said, the transformation. So it's like whatever needs to come forward is gonna come. That's cool.

SPEAKER_00 43:49

Can you kind of tell us like what so you're are you taking classes to train to train and teach other people? Yeah, so I th so are.

SPEAKER_01 44:00

Facilitator. Yes. So like so my job as a facilitator is to set a container. So to set up like the music and the journey that you're gonna go on while you're breathing. And then basically it's really to hold space. I do do if they're open to it, Reiki also energy round work.

SPEAKER_02 44:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:23

But it's it's really the person breathing is the one doing the work. The work person breathing is the one having the experience. Yeah, I'm just witnessing. It's very good. Literally just holding space for this to happen. Wow. And then as they reintegrate back in, like holding that space for them to process and yeah, absolutely, and helping them process that because it can be a journey for a lot of people, like as with any sort of spiritual uh therapies, like uh anything, top therapy, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 45:00

I mean, there's a lot of different therapies out there, there's chemical therapy, there's you know, like the psychedelic therapies, there's breath work therapy. I think that all of them can be just as moving or like it better for some people, other versus other practices. And I think breath work doesn't get enough voice. I think it needs to have more. I honestly wish that they would teach elementary school kids breathwork and PE. Like, I think that should be like a primary thing, at least minor like almost revisit throughout our life.

SPEAKER_01 45:36

Because like human beings are the only animals that after we experience trauma, we don't like violently shake and almost like bulls have like a yeah, what do you call that? Like a seizure. Like any other animal on the planet, if they have a if they go into fight or flight and they have a traumatic, they will instantly go into this like shake and they'll shake it off. We don't do it because we can't push it down. We take it in, we push it down, we take it in, we push it down. Even if some people do still read it. So it sets in our central nervous system. So when we use a breath work, it opens up, it resets our central nervous system.

SPEAKER_00 46:17

Wow. So do you only do one person at a time in your courses or to allow that space singularly for them, or does it vary?

SPEAKER_01 46:26

But it's so I do groups sometimes, and the group breath work ends up being different than one-on-one. Okay, because I you're breathing into a group energy. Yeah. So I always think it's like really awesome. That's what's gonna happen. And especially like when we do like little workshops, like it's just getting people together and allowing them to like tap into themselves safely and to others' energy, and everybody feel empowered.

SPEAKER_00 46:55

I think that's very like not to minister way, but I feel like that kind of brings us back to our roots.

unknown 47:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:05

Like our fire, breathing, like it's like we don't do that anymore.

SPEAKER_01 47:10

But we were like literally given this power within our body. Yeah, it's like there's so many things we can do, like go out and get first morning light that helps us. We can take our shoes off and go out.

SPEAKER_00 47:24

I open my curtains every morning. It really is. It's it's a little like it's like little.

SPEAKER_01 47:30

We have these things available to us that can make us feel better. I've been also the antidepressants for five years. I mean, I used to be on like five different medications, like I have fibromyalgia, like the pain. I'm not on pain medicine anymore. Like it's feeling like it's a good thing. But it was non-negotiable for me. Like I did it for three and a half years every two weeks for two hours, non-negotiable. Like I missed maybe three times in the whole year, like it was not a yeah, so but that set a good practice for me. I love to like that's commitment, make me like, and then at the end, when I saw so much transformation and my husband saw the transformation, my kids and like friends, and they're like, You can help people, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:18

Yeah, because I know I I have that felt sense of like you definitely do, like, you definitely I can feel it, it's radiating. I can feel it, I'm absorbing it already, and I haven't even done breath work with you, just talk work.

unknown 48:34

Talk work, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 48:35

So sovereign inhale was born before you even had a name of it, uh a name for it. So, when did you realize what was actually happening inside you going to become something you'd like to offer to other people? Well, I didn't really make it official until my breath work gal was like, okay, I'm moving to California. Okay, so this is going to be so like, yeah, it was a necessity. Like, I felt like a necessity, but it was also like I like I'm turning 49 and I want I'm willing to work into my soft life. You do not look 49. Thank you. My daughter's 27 out of 27.

SPEAKER_00 49:19

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 49:20

Yeah, or turning.

SPEAKER_00 49:21

You were like non-aging beautifully. You know, I don't even want to say aging beautifully because you're non-aging beautifully.

SPEAKER_01 49:28

Well, I'm looking at my mom. Yeah, my mom looks really young.

SPEAKER_00 49:32

But yeah, I just saw that breath work hit her up.

SPEAKER_01 49:35

It really knows how. I'm sorry I interrupted, but that's okay. No, but yeah, so it was looking at what can like a combination of human design and breath work where I can coach and work with people and maybe have it be mobile. I don't have to necessarily own a brick and mortar. I don't have to, I don't have to own a ton of color to make money. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 50:07

Yeah, that's more soft than having tons of it's your insight, you're sounding your knowledge and your experience and your passion. Yeah and it's you're providing it for people that are you gonna benefit. So, what does that look like when it's mobile? Do you meet people at the hall? Oh, well, I do it virtually.

SPEAKER_01 50:27

So like people can get on with me. And I actually, when they schedule it, I have an email that I feel like shows pretty good pictures about like how to upset their area. Uh-huh. Because like I need to be able to see like kind of your face and your chest area. Uh-huh. Yeah. That helps me with facilitating if you're doing it correctly or not. Right. Well, yeah, and you can't really not do it correctly. Like your body, even like I can suggest a breathing powder, uh-huh. But your body may be like, no, fuck that. I don't want to do that. Right. Yeah. And like if I offer it a couple times and you go back to the same thing, your body is like it's now speaking loose, and then that's what it needs to do.

SPEAKER_00 51:10

So, like, yeah, but so I'm like, if so, like if I wanted mobile, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:16

So like I do virtual, so I do a virtual group and I do virtual one-on-one. Okay. That's cool. And then I do like right now, I'm doing one-on-one for practicum. So it's still free right now. All of my stuff right now is still free because I'm in classes.

SPEAKER_00 51:32

So that's amazing. So I'm just thinking, I'm like, my mom and I would love to, I bet she would love to do this with me, with you. But yeah, we could totally do it. But I would think that would be so fun if we could all four do it together, like in person. Oh, yeah. We could do it at the hive. I've got to. Oh wow. Oh, that's so cool. We have to plan one within the next like six months. That would be amazing. I'm gonna need it after like all my traveling.

SPEAKER_01 51:59

Like, I really like an idea because I'm an entrepreneur and I like working with other entrepreneurs. Yeah, I feel like there's a lot of women putting together like different retreats and like days and stuff like that. And I would love to go in and facilitate for you.

SPEAKER_00 52:20

Yeah, I bet you definitely think it's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 52:23

I think someday at some point I'd like to donate time for like moms that have babies in the hospital. Yeah. That would be a great idea. So important to calm yourself. That's really good. Everything be so and you're like up here because you don't know what's gonna happen, but you need to be down here. I just think that would be precious.

SPEAKER_00 52:47

I mean, I have would be great. I have an idea for an upcoming baby shower. Oh yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:55

I love it.

SPEAKER_00 52:57

Not mine.

SPEAKER_01 52:58

Just a good or mine. Yeah, no, or mine. Nobody here. So let's talk a little bit about that soft life. You've used the word, I've heard you use this a lot, permission, a lot, and getting per giving yourself permission. Who were you waiting for permission from before you gave it to yourself? Ooh, everybody and anybody, like I know everybody, like when I always did core values, and I would always tell you and die on the cross that loyalty is my number one core value. But honestly, it wasn't because the one person in the world that I should have been loyal to was myself, and I was the one motherfucker that I was not with well, sorry, can you say that loyalty is your key value, your core value, right?

SPEAKER_00 53:48

That's so humble of you to say.

SPEAKER_01 53:50

Because I wasn't, so I'm not. I would abandon myself all the time to be loyal to other people. But what was I teaching?

SPEAKER_00 53:58

But see, I tell you because in past times, you know, I feel like it was me, like it was a part of me not giving myself permission. Well, yeah, what too? What do you think?

SPEAKER_01 54:10

Yeah, oh no, I grew up with people pleaser and I'm a recovering people pleaser. So giving myself any kind of permission was like, yeah, and so no, it's taken a lot of therapy for me too. And and just for me, again, it's come to it's come down to the people that I've surrounded myself with and like figured out yes, I can get permission. And being surrounded with people saying, Hey, what do you want? Like, I have a husband that asked me what I want now, which uh, you know, I'm pretty sure besides you, Rachel, and besides my friend Julie and some other girlfriends that I've had in my life, this is the first time that I've ever actually been asked that. Like, yeah, my parents never asked me what I wanted, they told me what I was gonna do, you know, and then if I argued with my parents, so they told you I was not. Oh yeah, but that's the funny part of it.

SPEAKER_00 54:59

I think that's where like some of my guilt probably comes to as well as just like you know, for some reason there's something under there. It's like, am I always doing something wrong when I'm not? Like I ask people all the time, you know, even when I'm just being myself. I always like Jen like, oh, was I too much? And she goes, You were fine, everyone loves you.

SPEAKER_01 55:16

Ever too much. And I was always laughing. You are too much, you need you talk too much, you have too many opinions.

SPEAKER_00 55:25

Yeah, or like, oh, you're being too silly, or you're being too nice, or oh, you're being too this or that. And and so I there is still that small voice, but having great supportive friends like Jen and Linda, everybody, and just like growing internally, like it helps build this amazing wall of just like it's so that part of me is getting smaller, still recognized. I give that part what it needs, and I put it where it needs to go, and I say I'll tuck you in. Yeah, let me know if you need something.

SPEAKER_01 55:53

And my parents action over.

SPEAKER_00 55:55

I I basically do that to little parts of myself. I say, okay, like I understand you're feeling sorry now. Like, let me give you what you need. And then go back to bed.

SPEAKER_01 56:05

Go back and then cut my face and like especially coming out of breath work because let me tell you that a lot comes out. Like, I have felt tears that I felt like came from underneath my toenails. Come all the way, and it felt like almost I was purging that black cloud of just like just like so almost like generational sorrow. And I'm not like just like my entire family has always been women that worry, and that was like what we were supposed to that was our role in life was to worry. What a family trust. Every inevitable or uninevitable thing that could possibly happen. And it's horrible, but there were so many, there's been so many miscarriages and so many different things with women, and I'm just like, is that because you worry? Yeah, you carry all that worry, yeah, all those negative energy things to us. So, like, I'm not gonna worry about the worst case scenario. Yeah, I only want to live it once. That's it.

SPEAKER_00 57:12

Yeah, you can have it in the game once and around those merry girls. That's right.

SPEAKER_01 57:19

Like so, when my brain starts saying, Well, it could happen, and my and I was trying to be gentle and be like, it could happen, but it could also be like unicorns, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 57:33

It'll only hurry you twice, if you worry about it now. Easier said than done. I'm a known spiraler. I love a song for you. I'm a known spiraler.

SPEAKER_01 57:43

This has been incredible, and and I love it. Like, I've known you for you, I've been doing my hair since before my wedding, which is this weekend, that'll be two years, which is crazy.

SPEAKER_00 57:56

I know, and I remember, I think it was months ago that you mentioned it, you told me she was getting into it or has been getting into it, for a while. And I because I I brought something about it, and I was like, oh man, I'll talk to her. And now finally, for full circle, we're finally.

SPEAKER_01 58:12

Cheers to that.

SPEAKER_00 58:14

I love all of the conversations we've had. I like don't want it to end. I think this has been an amazing episode.

SPEAKER_01 58:21

You know, the the cool thing is we can always do a part two down the road too much further into things.

SPEAKER_00 58:28

That'll be amazing. And we're gonna be breathing together, hopefully. I mean, we already are, but you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_01 58:35

So do you have how can people learn more about Sovereign Inhale and of course color therapy? So I did actually I have a website, Sovereign in Hell, and it's still like it's open and it, but it's a little bit under construction because I'm still like putting together offerings and stuff, but it okay, it takes to the booking page. Nice, you know, to book like virtual or and how to contact you.

SPEAKER_00 59:02

So if they have any questions or anything, yes, perfect.

SPEAKER_01 59:06

Very nice. And are you having social media for it as well? Or yes, under Sovereign and L. Okay, very good.

SPEAKER_00 59:13

And so yes, we'll have it in all of our show notes.

SPEAKER_01 59:16

Yes, we will, as well as of course color therapy. Yes. Oh, this is going down today. Yeah, so thank you so much for for for being on and letting us take over your awesome salon.

SPEAKER_00 59:28

Yes, we are here in her salon. I don't know if we mentioned that. We are here in color therapy and we are here with a Vu that she lovely provided. Yes, we love it. With these nice little fun glasses and um right off of Douglas.

SPEAKER_01 59:42

Yeah, right off of Douglas, right across the street from NAFS care park. Come look for her. We have, you know, it's it's funny. We have a lot of things coming up, but we have a lot of things that we don't have dates for yet. Yes. Um we are planning, well, we're coming, we're gonna start planning a I feel like we're gonna it's going to be an anniversary party, and we have Miss Giovanna Vu of Vu events helping us in our in the infancy of this situation.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:10

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:11

Also, we got an exciting email this morning. I'm not gonna say from who, but we officially have our first sponsor. If you're listening, you know who you are. We love you. Awesome. We're really, really excited. If you guys want to keep on this amazing journey with us, we'd love to have you. So please subscribe on YouTube. If you like what you're hearing, please write us some reviews wherever you feel like doing that. Don't forget to buy some merch. Visit our merch store. First of all, uh put the links in the show notes for you guys. And thank you guys, of course, for listening. Yeah. As always. And don't forget to support our lovely guest, okay?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:50

For short. Cheers. Cheers that this happened. Bye guys. See ya.